All My Heart is Yours

copyright 2000 by kris

He woke up slowly and looked around him. He saw the sterile white walls and smelled the antiseptic smells that were only smelled in hospitals. He tried to remember how he got there but the answers just weren't coming. He knew his name and where he was, he just couldn't remember how he got here.

The door opened and he looked towards the door, seeing his lover and life partner enter the room. He held out his hand to his love and reaches for him. "Hey lover. Are you all right?"

My lover looks at me with questions in his beautiful brown eyes. "I'm just fine. I was really worried about you. When I got the call, I just about died. Why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling good. Dammit Roy, I.. you.. I was scared shitless. The kids are outside waiting to see you." Johnny turned and walked out of the treatment room. Once in the hallway he lost it. He sank down and sat on the floor and let the tears roll.

Fourteen year old Jennifer DeSoto ran up to him and threw her arms around Johnny's neck. "How's Daddy?" she asked in a small voice.

"He's going to be okay, sweety. They're going to move him up to the Cardiac Unit in a few minutes. The doctors said that the attack was small and that it was caught in time." Johnny wiped his eyes and took a deep shuddering breath.

"I don't want to lose him, Jenny. I'm scared. We all still need him so much, especially Chris. He's still having problems and I know I can't handle him alone." Johnny put his head between his knees taking deep breaths trying to quiet the tears. Jenny handed him some tissue so he could wipe his eyes and blow his nose.

Sixteen year old Christopher DeSoto came walking down the hall, he looked just like his father. He had the same height and basic body shape and the same reddish blond hair. He approached Johnny and knelt down beside him. "How's Dad?"

"He had a mild heart attack. The doctors say he'll be all right, he just needs to rest." Johnny looked at Chris and saw the hurt in the boys eyes. "He'll be all right Chris. Trust me. The attack was mild. He probably won't even spend more than a couple of days in the hospital."

********

Doctor Kelly Brackett walked into the treatment room. He approached the exam bed that housed Roy DeSoto. Firefighter/ Paramedic for Los Angeles County and recent heart attack victim. He looked at the man lying there knowing that what he was about to tell him is going to change his life. The way he was to live and work and recreate were all changing due to a pesky heart that was getting old before it's time.

********

"Well Roy, we'll be moving you to your room soon. How are you feeling now? Are you still in pain?" Dr Brackett watched Roy closely.

"A little pain Doc, I'm more worried about Johnny. He really needs me to be around right now. Chris is getting in to trouble again and I just know Johnny can't handle him alone. Hell I can't handle him alone. What am I going to do?" Roy had tears running down his face. He was so scared for his lover and his family. He did not like being sick. He hated it almost as much as Johnny hated it.

"You'll be okay, Roy. We'll get you the proper diet and exercise program and you'll be dancing again in no time. The only difference will be is the amount of stress in your life. When's the last time you took a real vacation?"

Roy looked at the doctor. "About three years ago. Johnny and I took the kids to Disney World and then to Key West for some fishing. We just haven't had the time or money this year. After the barn caught on fire last spring it's taken a third mortgage to get it rebuilt and then we had to replace the two horses we lost as well. They had already been paid for. The insurance company refused to pay for the horses saying that the fire was not an accident even though they said that shoddy electrical work done by the last contractors we had to do the heating had fucked it up and....." Roy ran out of steam. He laid his head back against the pillows wishing Johnny were there with him.

"I know you and Johnny have had a tough time this year. I also know that you have had to put in quite a bit of over time the last six months. I really hate to tell you this Roy, but until you get better control of the stress in your life I won't let you go back to work at the station. You will work the desk at headquarters or here at Rampart teaching the new paramedics. I'll let you think about it and talk to Johnny. Roy you're 39 years old. Your father was your age when he died. I want you to think about that too. You are not overweight nor is your blood pressure too high. All you need to do right now is rest and decide how you want to spend your convalescence. Dr. Brackett then left Roy alone to think about what he wanted to do.

********

'Johnny, what am I gonna do?' Roy thought to himself. Johnny was no longer working as a paramedic thanks to a kid hyped up on angel dust who decided that he could fly and took himself and Johnny out a three story window, thusly ending Johnny's career. He now taught part-time at the kid's high school and worked the horses. He was a very popular horse trainer now, selling six to ten colts a year. They had over twenty horses of various ages in the corral now. The new barn was twice the size of the old one to accommodate the new horses.

Chris pushed the door to the room on the Cardiac Care floor that Roy was now safely ensconced and looked around. He looked younger then he was. Spotting his dad he headed over to him. Mindful of the tubes and wires he reached down and hugged his father. "How are you feeling Dad?"

"Better now that you are here. Where's Jenny?" Roy was still tired so he wore out quickly.

"She's down the hall talking to Miss McCall. I think Jenny wants to be a nurse when she grows up. Hey guess what, I scored three touchdowns in the game today. Man I can't wait until the college scouts come out. I just know that I'll get that scholarship, then you and Johnny won't have to worry about paying tuition when I go to college." Chris looked down when he realized what he had just said, he had been told by Johnny not to mention money or anything that had to do with money.

"I know you will son. Don't worry about it. You're the best running back to come out of that school and I just know that any University will want you to play for them. Now can you go get your sister. I want to talk to her." Roy reached out and tousled his sons hair.

Chris left the room as quietly as he had come in. He no longer felt the man he almost was, he was a little boy again who needed his dad real bad.

********

Johnny walked in the room and saw that his lover was sleeping. He sat down in the chair that was next to the bed, resting the cane he now used by his leg. He cursed that damn cane every day but he knew that he at least was walking. He spent nine months in a wheel chair and another three months learning how to walk again. Hell he could have just stayed in that chair but chose to walk again for the sake of his lover and the family the had built together.

"Hey Roy. You awake in there?" Johnny slowly stroked his lovers cheek with his finger. He picked up Roy's left hand and squeezed it gently running his finger along the ring that he had given to Roy on Christmas day almost six years earlier. He placed his lips on the palm of the hand then laid it gently down on the sheet.

Roy looked into the brown eyes of his lover. "I love you Johnny. I really need you right now. I'm so scared." Roy's voice was small. "Did you call my mom? I really want some one to be with her if you did."

"Shh, I called her friend Margaret and she's going to get her grand daughter to drive them here so that Mom can be with you and the kids. You just stop worrying. Doctor's orders." Johnny sat beside him and watched as his lover fell back into the sleep he so needed to get well.

Johnny jumped when he felt the hand land on his shoulder. "What? Roy?"

"Shhh. It's just me." Mike Stoker stood by the chair. He was now Captain for C-shift out of Station 51. He looked at Roy. "How's he doing? Brandon called me at the station yesterday and said something about Roy having a heart attack."

"Yeah, he was shopping over at that new mall when it happened. He was right in front of the Orange Julius. He just sorta keeled over. It was a mild attack though. He should be out of the hospital in a week. I don't think he'll be back to work for a long while though. Dammit Mike, he's only 39 years old. I'm 37 we're both to young to be changing careers. I had to almost two years ago because of that fucking kid. But Roy shouldn't have to worry about that." Johnny was pulled up and into Mike's arms before he knew what was happening.

"It's okay John. Brandon and I will watch the kids for you. You just take Roy up to your cabin in Vail and spend some time together. And don't give me that I gotta lotta work to do spiel. We've both heard it too many times. You and Roy are taking a vacation and that's final." Mike looked around and saw that Roy was staring at the two men.

"I agree with Mike, Junior. We need a vacation and going to the cabin in Vail sounds like just the ticket. We can sit around the resort bars and watch all the snow bunnies and their loser boyfriends skiing down the slopes and maybe we can get in a little cross country too. I know you've been cleared for that and I'm sure the mean ol cardiologist will agree to that type of exercise as long as I keep it easy and try not to over do it. So like Mike says. We go to Vail and they stay with the brats." Roy had a genuine smile on his face for the first time in the three days he'd been in the hospital.

********

Just then the 'mean ol cardiologist' walked into the room. "Well Roy," Dr. Everett Irwin started. "There's no clogging of the arteries like I feared. It was definitely a stress induced attack. Now I've been told by a reliable source that Johnny here is going to take you away from the rat race and family troubles for awhile. I think that's a good idea. And yes, you may do some cross country skiing just keep the pulse rate down and don't over do it. Johnny, you are not, I repeat, NOT to try any down hill skiing. Your back and hip are just not up to it and I talked to your orthopedist and she said that if she had to fix your hip one more time, she was going to use industrial strength super glue and glue your ass to the chair. And I know you know which chair I am referring to."

So it was set. Roy would spend four more days in the hospital undergoing various cardiac tests and then two days at home. On December 28th the two left LAX and flew to Denver's Stapleton International Airport. There Johnny picked up the rental car, a Land Rover just like he had back home. They then drove the two hour trip to Vail. They made it to their cabin just before sunset. A light snow was falling when they pulled up the drive that led to the cabin.

********

Their cabin was nestled high in the Rocky Mountains just west of the continental divide at over 10,000 feet in altitude. Both men were familiar with altitude sickness so they were going to take it easy the first few days. Just watching the snow fall and sitting snuggled up in front of the fireplace.

"Hey Lover. Come here and look at the snow falling." Johnny was sitting on the window seat that looked out over the lake at the back of the property. They got a lot of skiers that cut through but so far no damage had been done.

Roy put his arms around Johnny and laid his chin on his lovers shoulder. "It's beautiful Johnny. I'm gonna call Mike and make sure the Ranch is still standing. I hope Mike knows what he's doing. I know we have Dillon to handle the horses but I just can't see Mike and Brandon as the parental types and those kids of ours are going to take as much advantage of the situation as they can, especially Chris. Did I tell you, Mike caught him smoking again. He was walking down Mulhuland with some of his so called freak friends and Mike pulled over and offered him a ride home. Boy according to Chris, Mike let him have it with both barrels." Roy slowly slid his hands up under Johnny's sweater and shirt. He lifted them over his lover's head so that he was naked from the waist up. He loved the feel of skin that was warmed from soft cotton.

Johnny leaned back and put his head in the crook between Roy's head and shoulder. He started moaning and placed his hands on top of Roy's and followed that pattern he was making.

Johnny grabbed Roy's hand and led him to the bedroom at the top of the stairs. He then removed Roy's sweater and shirt placing little kisses over the warm skin as he revealed each part. He then claimed his loves lips and ground his arousal into Roy's totally erect cock.

They had not been able to make love for almost two weeks and Johnny was horny.

********

Johnny laid there in the after glow of some of the greatest sex he could ever remember having thinking of how he had gotten there.

"What are you thinking about, Babe?" Roy whispered in Johnny's ear.

"Just thinking about how I got here. I mean with you and the kids and all of it. I love you all so much but I still have a hard time understanding what you all see in me and why you keep me around." Johnny had tears glistening in his eyes.

Roy kissed away the tears and took his lover in his arms. "We love you because you are John Gage, the love of my life and the step parent to my children. You have been the glue that keeps this family together."

"Not to change the subject but a letter came today from the department of corrections. It looks like Jo's going to get out earlier then we were originally told. We need to go back to court and get the custody adjusted so that she can't interfere and try to take the kids. I already talked to Brandon and he's going to work on it right away." Johnny quit talking and looked at Roy.

"What did the bitch do to get out early. Hell, she hasn't talked to the kids in almost two years and they refuse to see her anymore. Chris could easily drive out there but he won't. Damn that woman. I tell ya Johnny, she better not try anything or I will make her life a living hell." Roy calmed down when he felt his heart begin to race.

********

Roy woke slowly to the smell of fresh brewed coffee. He peeled his eyes open slowly and saw his lover sitting on the bed next to him reading a book and sipping the brew.

Johnny looked down at the shifting of the bed "Morning lover."

"Morning. Coffee smell good. Is there any more for me." Roy asked hopefully, his diet of late had consisted of purging out the bodies system and replacing the bad with the good, so in other words, NO COFFEE.

"Yeah, there's some for you. Now you can only have 2 cups a day. The rest of the time it's either Tea or Cider okay?" Johnny softened the blow with feather light kisses rained all over the face.

Johnny brought Roy a cup of Decaf and a bowl of oatmeal with raisins and milk and some whole wheat toast. He set the tray on the bed next to his lover and sat back down. "Breakfast is served."

Roy smiled and started in on the food brought. He had not been a big fan of oatmeal until the dietician had given the men a strict diet for Roy to follow which left very little room for 'junk food'. He was now eating more vegetables and fresh fruit. He also ate more chicken and less beef. Meat was not eliminated from their diets but both men and the kids were eating more healthy than they had been.

********

After the healthy breakfast, Roy was ready for his daily walk. They now walked one half to one whole mile every day. The exercise was helping to strengthen Roy's heart and Johnny's hip.

It wouldn't be long and Johnny would be able to get rid of the cane. He still wouldn't be able to go back to work as a paramedic though.

They dressed warmly and left the cabin. They followed a trail some skiers had left along the back of the property, the went around the lake twice taking their time. The fresh air and sunshine coming out of the bright blue sky perked Roy right up.

They walked along the path hand in hand making plans for the next couple of days. They were spending New Years Eve in town at Mickey's a bar located in the Lodge at Vail.

********

They returned to the cabin and started fixing lunch. Johnny had turned on the radio to get a weather report. The meteorologist stated that a new storm was moving in from Utah and that they expected at least five new inches of powder by noon the next day. "Hey Roy, we can sit in the living room and watch the snow fall. Doesn't that sound romantic?"

Roy walked over to where Johnny was standing and pulled him into his arms. They stood there looking out the window as the first flakes started falling. "Yes my love, it sure does sound romantic. I so look forward to spending the rest of my life with you and starting with this snow storm I am happy. Happy that I'm still here to spend this evening with you. Happy that Mike and Brandon are watching the brats so we can spend this evening together."

Johnny leaned in and took Roy's mouth in a searing kiss. They stood there looking into each other's eyes until the phone rang.

"God, I hope the kids haven't killed anyone." Roy said with a sigh.

Johnny answered the phone." Hello?"

"Hi John, it's Mike. Can I ask you a question without Roy catching wind?" Mike sounded somewhat rattled.

"Shoot." Johnny looked noticing that Roy had gone into the kitchen.

"Did you know that Chris was smoking again and that his coach said that if he was caught one more time then he was off the team?" Mike said quietly.

"We knew he'd been messing around with cigarettes but I thought that the last grounding had gotten through to him. When did he get caught?"

"Brandon saw him on the football field at North Central and went over to pick him up. He seemed to be hanging out with those kids who caused all the problems a few years ago. I know they're out of school so I don't know what they want with Chris. Is there anything you want us to do while you're away?" Mike was real desperate for some advice.

"Yeah, if he's home put him on the phone, if he isn't have him call us no later that ten tonight. That's nine your time." Johnny was really starting to see red. They'd all gone round and round over Chris smoking and hanging out with the wrong kids.

"He's here, hang on." The sound of the phone being set down was all Johnny heard.

"Hello?" Christopher DeSoto spoke into the phone.

"Hello Christopher. I hear you are giving Mike and Brandon some problems. Are we going to have to go through what we went through last summer?" Johnny hated being the bad guy.

"No Uncle Johnny. I'm sorry I'm messin up your vacation. They asked me if I wanted to see some stereo equipment for my car. I just had to take a look."

"We'll talk about it later. You are now grounded to the house except for your games for the remainder of the time we are gone. If there are no basketball games or practice you are to be home doing your homework no later than four p.m. am I clear on this? You are grounded. No practice or game you are at home."

"Yes sir. I only have two games and four practices while you're gone. I will be home no later than four the rest of the time. What about the weekend? And school doesn't start again for another week." Chris was trying hard not to whine.

"You are not to leave the house except to go to practice and games. The rest of the time you are to be home. I know you have two papers for English that is due after vacation and they had better be done." Johnny was totally exasperated by the young man.

"I understand. I am sorry." Chris said quietly.

"We'll definitely talk to you about this when we get back." Johnny then finished that call informing Mike about the grounding and hung up.

********

Roy walked into the living room wiping his hands on a dish towel. "Who was that, Babe?"

"Mike. Now don't get all upset, but there was a problem back at home with our prodigal son. It seems he's been hanging out with that Joey kid again. He claims that Joey had some car stereo stuff for him to look at. I took care of everything so you don't have a thing to worry about but getting the rest you need."

"If you say so Dad." Roy kissed his life partner and dragged him into the kitchen for dinner.

********

Roy and Johnny had been in Vail for three days and the snow had fallen pretty much steadily. They spent most of their time either making love in front of the fire or soaking away the aches of the years in the hot tub in the master bath.

On New Year's Eve they dressed in suits and headed into town. The roads were relatively clear given the amount of snow that had fallen. They made it to Mickey's with time to spare. They ordered a bottle of Champagne to be delivered to the table at 11:45. They then ordered a light dinner. They had two hours until the partying was to begin and another hour and a half after that until midnight.

They listened to the music commenting on how much it had changed over the years. The music seemed to go from songs you could understand to lyrics that made no sense to anybody except the kids. Roy took Johnny's hand when a song came on that took them back to the first time they made love. The song built just like their passion did ending in a crashing crescendo.

"I remember this song from what seems a life time ago." Roy brought Johnny's hand to his lips and kissed the palm lightly.

"I love you so much Roy. I never want this night to end." Johnny looked around then leaned in and placed a light kiss on Roy's lips.

The waiter delivered their meal and inquired if they needed anything else.

They sat there and ate off of each others plates. They shared shrimp scampi and a T-Bone steak. They had a salad and fresh baked rolls. They stayed away from alcohol for the evening saving the amount Roy was allowed until midnight.

********

Midnight saw the two toasting each other to a new year. They were sure things would be better then they had been.

They arrived back at the cabin around twelve forty five and went straight to the bed room where they fell on the bed wrapped in each others arms. They took their time removing each others clothes. Roy led the way into the bathroom and started the tub filling. He loved the hot tub and couldn't wait to warm up in it.

They slept the sleep of the totally sated and it lasted until well past noon the next day.

********

Back at Casa de Gage y DeSoto.

Mike Stoker was at the end of his rope. Chris knew he was grounded yet he had snuck out the night before to go to a party and had come home not only drunk but higher than a kite. He did not want to ruin Roy and Johnny's vacation, but he just didn't know what to do.

Roy's mother was too old to make the trip to L.A. and Hank was out of town as well so he had no one to turn to.

Mike called the only other person he knew who could control Chris and that was his old probation officer. Mike called Mark Aumunson that afternoon explaining the problems they were having. Mark offered to take Chris off their hands for a couple of hours and talk to the lad.

"Thanks Mark. Call us if there's any problems." Mike hung up and went over to Brandon. He pulled his lover into his arms and kissed him long and hard.

Jenny walked in the room just then. "Man, you two are worse than Dad and Uncle Johnny." She said with a giggle. "Don't worry guys, Dad explained everything to me when I was nine so you can do what ever you want. Just keep the sex part in the bedroom. Okay?"

"Right Jen." Mike said.

********

Chris was sitting at his desk toying with his homework. He took a baggie out of his desk drawer and looked at it's contents. He'd been smoking pot for several months now. He used it to try to take away the pain and frustration he'd been feeling.

His most recent girlfriend, Heather Crane, had broken it off with him saying that he was a bad influence. He figured he didn't need her if she was going to be a square.

He opened up his bedroom window and climbed out onto the eave that was right outside his window. He sat there and rolled a joint, he then took the first toke that was the roughest. He coughed for a few seconds then took another hit. He sat there for several hours listening to the Kinks and the Ramon's and got 'comfortably numb' as Pink Floyd liked to get.

********

Meanwhile back in Vail:

Johnny and Roy were sitting in the hot tub soaking after going cross country skiing. They hadn't heard anymore from LA so they assumed everything was going fine since the talk John had had with Chris.

"You know Johnny, I really will hate leaving this place. It has been the most therapeutic of vacations I have ever been on." Roy stroked his hand through Johnny's now much shorter brown hair. He bent his head down and placed little kisses and nips on his lovers neck.

Johnny leaned back and sighed. He hadn't the heart to tell Roy that his hip and leg that he'd injured two years ago, were killing him. He hadn't had pain like he was feeling in well over a year. He took a deep breath and grabbed Roy's hand.

"Babe, I can't believe I'm about to say this but, I hurt way to much to do anything tonight." Johnny turned his head and looked at Roy.

"Is your hip hurting?" Roy sounded concerned.

"Yeah, a little. I think maybe I shouldn't have gone skiing. Maybe the Doc's are right and I should just feel lucky I can even ride a horse and stop trying to do more physically." Johnny sighed at this statement. True the doctor's had told him that basically he had healed as much as he was going to and to not try to do more than what his physical therapist allowed of him.

They got out of the tub with Roy helping Johnny and went to bed content to just hold each other and sleep.

********

Roy had called the airlines three days before they were scheduled to fly home and upgraded the tickets to first class to give Johnny the room he would need to stretch out his leg. Since sitting became uncomfortable in a short period of time Roy thought he'd be able to keep Johnny in his seat and away from the stewardess this way.

They flew back to LA on the 10th of January. Roy was scheduled for even more tests on the twelfth of the month before it would be decided if Roy would return to the station or take a desk or teaching job with either the Department or the Hospital.

********

Chris wasn't home when his dad got home. In fact Jenny hadn't seen him and Mike had just started calling his friends to hunt the boy down. Apparently Chris' basketball coach had called and said that Chris had missed not only two practices but a crucial game as well.

"I swear Johnny, I am going to kill that boy. He has been more trouble this past year then in the past four. He needs to get back in therapy I think." Roy turned to Johnny and looked totally devastated. He was once again losing control of his family and he had no idea how to fix it.

"Shh, it's gonna be okay Roy, I'm here to help. Remember, I am also in charge. Your sole purgative is to get well. You need to concentrate on taking care of your heart and health. I will take care of the kids. Now why don't you go upstairs and lay down. I'll find Christopher and make sure that he understands what kind of trouble he's in. I will not stand for that boy to make our lives a living hell like he's been bent on doing recently." Johnny led Roy upstairs and into their room. He got Roy undressed and curled up under the covers. Planting a kiss on top of his lovers head Johnny then left the room. He had a surly assed teen to find and a sixteen year old butt to kick.

********

Christopher was sitting in the living room of one Barry Mitchell. A friend from his earlier childhood and the one who turned him on. (to pot.) He was sitting there with a young girl sitting on his lap as they shared hits off a joint and tongue filled kisses. He kept running his free hand up and down her back slowly working his way to her front.

He finally couldn't stand it anymore, he dumped the girl, whose name was a mystery to his drug addled mind, onto the floor and slowly undid her pants. He had her stripped in no time and was freeing his straining member from the confines of his Levis. All he knew then was that he needed release and to prove that he wasn't just like his dad. He plowed into the girl taking her innocence and virginity with as much force as his sixteen year old body could. He felt himself grab her hips as he thrust in and out. He saw the bruises he was leaving on her silky smooth young skin. He finished and pulled out. He threw her clothes at her and put himself back together. Taking a joint, he lit it then left the house. He headed home. He knew that his Dad was due back that day.

********

Johnny was standing in Chris' room looking at the mess. He spotted something on the desk that drew his attention. He went over to the desk and picked up the little plastic bag. He then cursed Christopher and hoped the boy showed his face soon.

"Damn you Christopher! You promised. You promised your father that all this was behind you and you weren't going to do drugs." He cursed the boy aloud. Jenny was standing in the doorway when she heard every word he'd said.

"Uncle Johnny? Is Chris in trouble again?" Jenny quietly asked.

"Yes Sweety, he is. Very big trouble I'm afraid." Johnny walked over to the girl and pulled her into a hug. "Why don't you go and say hi to your Dad? He's laying down in the bedroom and I'm sure he'd like your company. He missed you an awful lot while we were gone, ya know."

Jenny smiled and headed off to see her Daddy.

********

Chris was driving real fast. He knew he was supposed to be home and he was late. He didn't see the car that was coming at him. All he heard was the squeal of brakes and the sound of metal on metal. Then all he knew was darkness.

********

Station 51 and 36 were called to the motor vehicle accident. Captain Stanley and crew just so happened to be working that day sans Mike, Roy and Johnny.

Chet was the one who discovered Chris in the mangled up Pacer. The driver of the Bronco had not been wearing a seat belt and had been thrown through the windshield.

Paramedic Craig Brice went to the car and helped Chris. He was stuck in the car for over two hours waiting to be extricated. He had worn his seatbelt but had still hit his head. He also had multiple fractures and lacerations. Brice did his best to stabilize young Chris. He informed Rampart of the identity of the victim while waiting to get the two vehicles apart so that they could get out Chris and the other driver who happened to be dead.

The other driver was also a teenager. He was seventeen and drunk. He died on impact. Chris was also intoxicated being under the influence of a controlled substance and alcohol.

********

The phone rang at the Ranch at five p.m.. Johnny answered it hoping that it was Chris.

"Hello?" Johnny growled into the phone.

"John? It's Hank. Man, I hate to tell you this but, you need to get Roy and Jenn down to Rampart as soon as possible. Chris was in a head on collision. He's been extricated and is enroute to Rampart right now. Vince is on his way over. I suggest you get him or Mike to drive you to the hospital." Hank finished.

"Yeah, uhmm, sure Cap. I'll take care of everything." Johnny hung up without saying goodbye. He turned and saw Jenny standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"What's wrong Uncle Johnny?" Jenny saw the look on her Uncles face. The last time she saw that was when her dad had had his heart attack.

"Get your coat Jenn. I need to get your dad. Chris was in a car accident. We need to get to Rampart." Johnny headed up the stairs to his room.

Jenny went in search of Mike and Brandon and told them the problem. They both headed up to John and Roy.

Mike entered the room and saw John sitting on the edge of the bed looking at his lover. "John? We need to get Roy up and go."

Mike and Brandon got John and Roy and Jenny into the car and headed to Rampart. Vince was close behind.

********

Dr's Early and Brackett were working feverishly on Chris when the group arrived. They were met by Dixie McCall. She ushered the extended family into the doctor's lounge at the end of the hall. She made sure that all had either coffee or juice to drink.

She then filled them in on what had happened.

"Chris suffers from a mild concussion, three fractured ribs and a punctured lung. His left leg was broken in two places. He probably won't be playing football in the fall. His right elbow was shattered. He apparently was driving with a stiff arm and when he made impact it shattered the elbow. He's in a coma right now. The worst part was the drug test. It came back positive. I'm sorry Roy, Chris was under the influence of marijuana and alcohol. He probably could have avoided the accident if he'd been sober." Dixie looked at Roy and got real concerned. Roy had gone white he was breathing shallowly.

Johnny looked at him and slipped into paramedic mode. He took Roy's wrist in his hand and began to count the beats. "Where's it hurt babe? I need to know."

"My left arm feels real funny Johnny. I think it's happening again. God, not another one." Roy slumped in his chair at that moment.

Dixie went to the phone and called in the code as Johnny and Mike started CPR. Jenny stood off to the side wrapped securely in Brandon's arms. He murmured nothing words in her ear as they watched the orderlies and doctors take Roy from the lounge and into a treatment room.

********

Several hours later found Jenny back at home under the care of Hank's wife Elaine and their youngest daughter, Amber. It also found Johnny sitting beside Roy's bed in the CCU. Roy had suffered a massive MI. Brought on no doubt by the stress of the car accident involving his son.

His lover was still asleep from the medications they had given him. He laid there quietly. Johnny reached out and took Roy's hand in his and kissed the palm. He then placed the palm against his cheek. He prayed to the Gods for his lover to wake up and tell him he's okay.

"Roy, Love. I need you. I can't handle the kids by myself, even though I say I can, I know I can't. Please Babe, you've got to wake up. Chris needs his father now. So does Jenny babe. She's so scared." Johnny let the tears fall.

********

Roy slept the rest of the night and into the next morning. He woke just before noon. He saw the brown eyes of his lover.

"Hey there Blue eyes. I see you decided to join us." Johnny said in the way of greeting.

********

Roy smiled at his lover and life partner. He then reached out and ran his fingers over Johnny's cheek. "How are you?"

"I'm fine love. You on the other hand have finally done it. You suffered a pretty nasty heart attack. This one is gonna take a while to get over. Now don't worry, Chris is awake and is going to be just fine. Jenny is at home with Hank's wife and daughter looking after her. Mike and Brandon are in the hall waiting to see you along with all the rest of the shift. Chet for some reason seems most anxious to see you. Beware the phantom." Johnny bent down and planted a soft kiss on his lips.

"I want to see Chris, Johnny. I need too." Roy started getting agitated.

"Now Roy, you must calm down. Chris is all right. You can see him later. You need to stay calm and rest right now." Johnny placed his hands on Roy's chest. He made certain that the wires that were attached to Roy to monitor his heart, were still attached. He laid his hand gently on Roy's brow. "Now you sleep and let me worry about our son okay?"

"Our son, I like the way that sounds Junior." Roy said as he drifted off to sleep letting the darkness claim him.

********

Chris woke up to a soft hand on his brow. He felt sick to his stomach. He opened his eyes and stared right into those of Dixie McCall. Chris was still on the respirator to allow his lung to heal. He winked at Dixie and she winked back.

"How are you doing handsome? You scared quite a few people you know? Is you stomach upset any?" Dixie rubbed his arm softly.

Chris shook his head in the affirmative. "Well let me get you something for that." Dixie turned and left the ICU room.

Chris felt the tears start to fall. He hadn't meant to hurt anyone. He was scared. He thought his father would be here to see him. He wondered where his father was.

Dixie came back in at just that moment, "Why are you so upset Chris?"

Chris tried to convey his concern to the nurse. He started by raising his left hand off the sheet and waving it.

"Chris you need to settle down." Just as she said this Johnny walked into the room.

"Hey buddy, how you feeling?" Johnny placed a hand on Chris upper thigh.

"Your father is all right. He had another heart attack yesterday but it wasn't that serious. He will need a lot of time to recover. You need to think about where you stand in this family. You need to promise to stay away from drugs and to straighten up your act." Johnny sat down on the chair next to the bed.

********

Jenny was sitting on the couch holding a pillow on her lap. She was real scared. Elaine Stanley came into the living room and sat down next to the young lady. "Jenny? I just got off the phone with Johnny. Your dad is going to be all right. He's awake and talking. Chris is awake too. Do you want to go see them?"

Jenny slowly nodded her head. "Please, I need to see my Daddy. I need to know that he is all right. Please take me to him." Jenny had tears streaming down her pretty face.

Elaine drove the distraught girl over to the hospital to see her father and brother.

********

Chris was sitting up in bed trying his best to answer the police officers questions. Problem was, he just didn't remember all that much about the accident. He was sure that he was on the right side of the road, "Like I told you, sir, I was on the right side of the road. I was going maybe forty miles an hour. Not much faster than that. I really wasn't payin' much attention to oncoming traffic. I was too worried about not bein home when my old man got home. I was grounded and I wasn't supposed to go anywhere and I had gone over to a friends house. I was late leavin' and I guess I was goin too fast, but I swear, that car came outta nowhere. I mean, I don't even remember hitting it."

"Well Chris, in this respect you're a lucky young man. The other car hit you. The driver was more intoxicated then you and he was killed. You on the other hand, will be arrested for a DWI and might just lose your license until you're eighteen or so. You will walk away from this. I hope you've learned a lesson from all this as well." Officer Brad Hickman lectured the lad.

"Oh, yes sir. I will, I mean, I did, learn a lesson. Has anyone seen my dad? I keep asking the nurses and they just shake their heads and leave the room." Chris had been in the hospital for three days and had seen neither his dad or Johnny. He was getting worried.

"I'll check on that for you." Brad turned and left the room.

Dixie entered almost as soon as the officer had left.

"Hi there cutie. How are you feeling today?" Dixie was trying to cheer the boy up.

"I want to see my Dad, NOW! Where is he? WHY WON'T ANYONE TELL ME WHERE MY DAD IS?!?!?!" Chris was clearly upset.

"He's in the Cardiac Care Unit, Chris. He had another heart attack. It happened as I was telling him and Johnny about your injuries. We haven't told you before because you weren't that coherent until this morning. Now you will lay back and I will see about getting Johnny in to talk to you." Dixie left the room and headed to the phone.

********

Johnny walked into Christopher's room fifteen minutes later. He did not look good to Chris. He looked older and very tired.

"Hello Christopher." Was all Johnny could say civilly. He really wanted to throttle the boy.

"Hi Uncle Johnny. Uhmm, how's my Dad? Miss McCall told me that he had another heart attack? Is that true?" Chris couldn't look Johnny in the eye.

"Yes Chris, that's true. Your Dad's upstairs right now. He's doing all right, but he still has a ways to go." Johnny sat down in the chair by the boys bed. "He'll be moved to a regular room tomorrow. I think Dr. Brackett wants to put you two in the same room to make it easier on the family to visit you. I think he needs to do it so you can explain to your father why you had to go and act like a grade A asshole. I can not believe that after all we went through with you four years ago that you would still do drugs. How long has it been going on?" Johnny was not very happy to be seeing Chris at this moment. He was very hard pressed to hold his temper. He knew the young man was hurt but he didn't see that as an excuse for causing his father's health crisis. He also knew that Chris was not the sole reason for Roy's heart problems. He knew that it was mostly hereditary.

Chris had a totally devastated look on his young face. He hurt from the pain in his body and from the words Johnny had thrown at him. "I'm so sorry. You'll never know how sorry I am. I didn't mean to make Dad sick, honest. I don't know why I've been doing the things I've been doing. I mean. I know drugs are wrong and I promised you and Dad that I wouldn't do them, but, dammit, I'm sick of all the bullshit things that the assholes at school have been saying about Dad and you and me. They're so damn cruel and I know I'm not supposed to let it get to me, but I do. It hurts so bad Johnny, I don't know what to do. I tried to talk to you and Dad but then Dad got sick and you were there all the time. I didn't know what to do. Mike made me talk to Mr. Aumunson but that fucker has his head up his ass." Chris laid back on his pillow. He had tears rolling down his face and he tried to wipe them with the back of his hand. Johnny went over to the bed and sat by him on the bed. He pulled the boy into his arms as best as he could without causing him too much pain.

Chris didn't know how long he cried but he knew that he was feeling as if a great weight had lifted off his chest. Suddenly it was easier to breathe again and the pain was a little less there. He pushed himself off Johnny's chest and ran the back of his hand over his nose. Johnny handed him a tissue and told him to blow.

"I'm sorry, Uncle Johnny. I didn't mean to do that." Chris was still trying to be macho again.

"I know Chris. I'm sorry I yelled at you like I did. But you scared me and your father and then he had another attack. I just don't know what to do. I can't control you and be there for your father. When are you going to understand that I love your father and you and your sister more than anything in this world. I would die if your father died. I just couldn't stand living if I didn't have him. I missed out on so much growing up and then your father chose me to love. I never told you kids this but I didn't think I was worthy of your father's love. I mean, I spent my life thinking that I was worthless. Thanks to my dad, he hit me and told me that I was nothing more than a worthless half-breed. After my mom died he farmed me off to my Uncles Ranch and left me there. I never saw him again. My Uncle decided that the only thing I was good for was as a punching bag. That's why your father and I fight over how to discipline you and your sister. There have been times when your father wanted to spank you or hit you in any way, I always stopped him. We would have these long arguments over it. To tell you the truth there have been times when I myself have wanted so badly to beat your ass that I have had to leave. I would go off and ride for hours trying to get over my anger. You pissed us off so much at times that I thought your dad was gonna give up on you. We spent many nights worrying about you and Jenn and wondering if we were doing the right things or is it was all for naught. Then the phone call came. I watched your father almost die sitting there listening to Dixie rattle off your injuries. He got this look on his face. I mean it Chris, if you ever pull another stunt like this I myself will beat the shit out of you." Johnny got up from the bed and left the room.

********

Jenny knocked on the door before entering. "Chris? You mind if I come in?"

"Nah, it's okay squirt. Come on in." Chris had red-rimmed eyes from crying after Johnny had left.

"Are you okay?" Jenny asked quietly.

"No Jenn I'm not. I fucked up big time and Dad's sick because of it. I shouldn't have been over at Barry's and I shouldn't have smoked the pot or drank the beer or gotten behind the wheel of a car in the condition I was in. If you never learn anything from me, please learn this. Okay. I was a class one fuck up. I don't want you to turn our like me." Chris had tears anew running down his face.

Jenn was shocked, she hadn't seen Chris cry in well over three years. She thought that once he had reached thirteen that he didn't need to cry anymore because he was a man. Boy was she wrong!

"It's okay Chris. Dad's not blaming you for his heart attack. If anything he's blaming himself for your accident. He feels he shouldn't've gone off to Vail when you needed him." Jenny was soon crying along with her brother.

"Ah Jenny. That's not right. I need to get outta here and go see him now. I wish they'd let me see him." Chris blew his nose and sighed heavily.

Dixie came in the room at just that time. "Well Mr. Christopher. I have it on good faith that you want to see your father. Am I right?"

"Yes ma'am. I would very much like to see him. Do you think I can?" Chris sat up on the bed straighter.

"I think that can be arranged. After you eat your dinner, which will be delivered in about ten minutes, I will take you myself up to see your father. Is that okay?" Dixie could see the smile appear on the boys face for the first time in days.

********

Thirty minutes later, Chris was wheeled up to the CCU to visit with his dad. He felt better now that he was going to see the man he had never wanted to hurt, yet had hurt the most.

Roy was sitting up a bit talking quietly with Johnny when Dixie pushed open the door. Both men looked towards the door.

"Hi Dad." Chris said quietly.

Roy turned his head to look at his son. He saw the tears streaming down Chris' face. "Hi Chris. You can come closer."

Johnny got up and pushed Chris closer to the bed as Dixie left the room.

"I'm so sorry Dad." Chris tries to get out of the chair but is hindered by his leg. "I didn't mean to make you so upset. I was trying to get home before you and Johnny got there but I didn't make it. I was stupid. I left when I knew I was grounded and I got stoned and drank beer and drove my car. I'm just a class A fuck up and I wouldn't blame you if you sent me away to Military School or somethin'." Chris was really crying now.

Johnny went over to the boy and hugged him. "We're not going to send you away, Chris. You're stuck with us until you graduate High School and go on to College. And even then you'll be expected to show your face at least once a month. Laundry included." Johnny laughed when he saw the look on the boy's face.

"I'll get better I promise. I'll stay away from the kids who do drugs and stay away from the drugs themselves." Chris was ready to promise anything at this juncture.

Roy looked his son straight in the eye when he spoke, "Oh yeah, you will stay away from the drugs and the kids who do them. You will also go through drug interaction and then if deemed necessary you will go through a drug rehab program. I will not have you doing drugs ever again. If you are so much as caught with drugs after the program and therapy I will not hesitate to beat some sense into that brain of yours. Is that understood?"

"Yes Sir!" Chris looked over at Johnny, "I want to thank you for changing the way Dad disciplines us. I just wish I had been better behaved. I know that it's hard to put up with the bullshit I have been putting you guys through. I'm so sorry and I will do my best to be a better son to you both and a better brother to Jenn and a better person all around."

Both men looked at the boy, Roy spoke first, "All we ask for Chris is that you respect those around you and yourself. If you respect yourself it's easier to respect others and they in turn will respect you."

Johnny again hugged the boy then looked at Roy. He saw that Roy was getting sleepy. "Let's get you back to your room Chris so your Dad can get some rest." Johnny pushed the boy out into the hall and caught a pretty student nurses attention. He asked her to take Chris back to his room.

"Hey Babe, you still awake?" Johnny sat again by Roy's bedside.

"MMMM, barely. I'm glad Chris came here today." Roy said softly as Roy slowly gave into the darkness and slid into sleep.

Johnny stayed there a few more minutes then headed home. He needed a good nights sleep and a shower.

********

Two weeks later, both Roy and Chris were discharged from the hospital. Roy with explicit directions on diet and exercise to maintain his cardiac health and to get his position back with the Department.

Chris was sent home with his leg in a cast and instructions to attend the on site youth support group at Rampart. He had a court hearing in another week that would determine whether or not he kept his license or be sent to jail for his DWI. He was hoping he'd just lose his right to drive then spend anytime in a juvenile detention center.

Jenny helped Johnny cook meals that appealed to all but met Roy's strict diet. She also took long walks with her father and got to know him better than she thought she knew him. They told each other their dreams and aspirations and became best friends.

"Dad, Uncle Johnny said that he wouldn't be able to live if you died. Do you feel the same way about him?" Jenny asked on one of their walks around the lake.

"Yes Jenn, I do. I live for you and your brother, but mostly for Johnny. I love him and he loves me. We promised each other all those years ago that we would be together no matter what. I know we've had some rough times, especially after Johnny's accident two years ago, but we're still together as a family so I would say we're together for keeps." Roy put his arm around his daughter's shoulders while they walked the last thirty yards to the back door of the house.

********

Roy lived a healthier life, seeing him out live his father by thirty years.

Johnny continued as a teacher and guidance counselor of teens and a step parent to Roy's children and a step parent to Roy's grand-children.

One day in the late 1990's Christopher went to his father. He was about to be married for the second time in his life and he wanted to clear something up with his father.

"Dad?" Chris started when he sat down on the couch in the living room of the house he grew up in, "I want to say something and I don't want you to interrupt, just wait until I am through. Now I know I've caused you and Johnny and even Jenn a lot of trouble over the years. I have been sober now for over ten years and I am ready to begin my life with Megan and have her help me raise my son and daughter. After Sherry died, I thought I would never find love again. I have you and Johnny to thank for taking care of the kids so I could get my act together. Then you both helped me start over again and backed me in my business. Well times are good and my company is doing great. I have purchased several shares of stock for you guys to use when you're ready to retire. I know it's not much, but it's the least I can do. The stocks are in a trust. It's worth last count of at least two hundred and sixty thousand dollars. The way the market is going, unless we get the Republicans back in office, I see you two being able to retire with at least a mil by two- thousand and four."

Roy didn't know what to say. He was not expecting his son to be so generous. "Thank you Chris. Johnny and I will use the trust when we retire. We'll add it to our pensions. Johnny is still receiving disability from LA county and I will be retiring as Battalion Chief next year. May be in five years we can take the money and invest it some more. If there is one thing Johnny likes, it's money."

Both men laughed and shared some quiet time together.

********

Three days after their talk, Roy stands beside Chris as his best man at his wedding to Megan. Chris' two children act as flower girl and ring bearer. Little Chelsea looked beautiful in her peach dress walking down the isle. She was still shy at the age of seven and wanted to get down the isle quickly so she could hide behind Megan.

Steven Roy was nine and thought that the ring bearer should be younger. He wanted nothing to do with the wedding. He was more interested in playing with his best friend Michael and playing his play station.

The wedding went off with out a hitch and Chris and Megan left the kids with Dad and headed on their honeymoon to Hawaii.

Tucked in an envelope and left on Johnny's desk was a gift for Roy and Johnny from Chris and Jennifer.

"What's this?" Johnny asked as he sat down to grade some papers and send out some e-mail.

"Dunno." Was Roy's one syllable reply.

Johnny opened the envelope and just sat there. Roy looked over at his lover of over twenty years and got a little upset. "What is it Babe?" "Two tickets to Europe. Germany to be exact. Chris and Jenn are sending us on a tour of Germany, Sweden and then England next summer during break. They say it's a 'Thank you' for all we've done for them over the years. Damn Roy, you raised yourself some great kids." Johnny choked back a sob as the tears rolled down his face.

Roy went and put his arms around his best friend and lover. He quietly spoke," No love, WE raised some great kids." He then captured Johnny's lips with his own and kissed him long and passionately.

********

~fini~

Back to the Stories Page

Web design copyright 2002-2008 by kris
Page last updated on: Monday January 28, 2008 19:56:59 -0700